Invader Zim

When I first watched Invader Zim, several years ago, I instantly fell in love with the cartoon. Especially the quirky robot GIR. On a sci-fi convention I bought some GIR patches, never daring to use them on anything I still have them left. I use this one as a wall decoration instead, hanging from a line in the bedroom wall with a clothespin.

A cloth patch I bough on a sci-fi convention.

The first Invader Zim crafts I made was an acrylic painting of MiMi. MiMi is the robot of one of Zim's nemesis named Tak. Compared to GIR's patchy and to be honest rather crappy dog disguise MiMi uses a sleek, dark and creepy cat disguise. To make here even more spookier she swirls around almost into a shadow when moving, in contrast to GIR's clumsy and awkward movement. And of course one can not be an evil robot whit out red glowing eyes. So this I my take on MiMi, hope you like it!

MiMi from Invader Zim. Panted in acrylic paint on canvas by me.

My next craft I made was the lovable floating mini-moose. Though he only appear in one Christmas special episode, I could not help myself and just had to make him! I decided to not make his mouth since I did not like how it looked on him when he was finished. The one teeth he usually have sticking out I do miss but this was the best compromise I could make. He is made with acrylic yarn and the design is made by me. Though I have not written a pattern of it. When I crochet I usually just scribble down a few notes for myself. Mostly I use drawings to describe my idea.

The mini-moose I crocheted. Posing on the sofa for the camera.

Of course I had to make a mini hama bead GIR. He is currently attached to my monitor along with my Yoshi mini hama bead. I based the him of a pattern I found online. Unfortunately I don´t remember the source since it was a long time since I made it.

A mini hama bead version of GIR. 

I made another painting combining what might be the two cutest characters in the show. That is if you can call piggy, the pink rubber pig toy, a character. I made the painting in a much brighter background than the MiMi painting to make it more joyful. Also really love the whimsical feel the painting have so I am very pleased with the result of the painting thought more with the background I think!

GIR and Piggy from Invader Zim. Panted in acrylic paint on canvas by me.

The next project, if I ever get around to make it, will be to crochet GIR in his robot form. I do think I have the yarn for it at home just need to find time, will and energy for it. Perhaps it's time to re-watch all the episodes. That could give me the motivation boost that I need!

Fear of pushing send

I live in a constant fear of pushing send or publish. It may sound silly but it might even be my largest fear. Sure I can be afraid of the occasional spider but that's just the thing, they are only occasional. Not something that I encounter every, single, day. Whether it's texting with a friend, writing on Facebook, sending email or just typing this on my blog. I know my dyslexia is a big part of the problem and I hate using it as a "excuse" for my spelling and grammar. I hate having to explain my bad spelling and grammar mistake. I wish I just could think about what I wanted to write without having to worry about the letters.

I'm from Sweden so English is not my native language. Sure I could use that as a "excuse" as well but that is so not the point. The thing is I have just as much trouble writing in Swedish as in English. Perhaps even more since almost all I read is in English now days. When I got my diagnosis I was 19 years old. Had just started university and had a lecture in what different aid the school provided for handicapped persons. When the she started talking about dyslexia I almost cried. I knew I had to do something. They provided a free test and I took it. The results was clear, I had dyslexia.

I sort of always knew though. I have always struggled with spelling and grammar. No matter how many hours I prepared I always made several mistakes. Even thought I know how to spell the word, the letters just do not want to come out in the right order. Or even the right letters for that matter. A common mistake for me is to mix up the letters b,d,p,q. My mother have always tried to get the teachers to make me take a test before but they always said "But she is doing so well in school, she would never do that if she had dyslexia". Fact is I did, except in learning Swedish, English and German. I somehow did okay though.

I have always liked to read and that is probably the one thing that saved me. The test showed I had way below average reading speed, ability to detect misspellings, and trouble with rhyme and have no innate understanding of the phonetic alphabet. On the positive side it also showed that I have above average understanding of meaning of words and that when writing a summary of a text and getting the time to think, re-read and focus I do very well. So the theory is that since I have read so much I am doing well as long as I get the time I need.

A bookmark I made to remind my self to continue to read

This has encourage me to read even more, since that seems to be the thing that helps me the most. Of course spell-check is a huge help, but I find it hard to learn from that. Also it almost feels like I rely to much on them. Though many of my mistakes don't show in the spell-checker and that is what I usually worry about when writing a text. There are so many weird and odd mistakes I do and that I can't find myself. Sometimes if I can, I take help from my boyfriend. Other times I just press send especially when it's something that I have to send just at that time. The absolutely worst is when I want to write but don´t have to. More times then not I am to afraid so I simply just don´t write it.

So no matter how illogical it it. It is one of my biggest fear. Because I know how unprofessional spelling mistakes look. How much comments and hatred grammar and spelling errors can cause online. And at the same time I know that there is no easy way around it. When I was little I instead of trying to write a word that I did not know how to spell, I instead rewrote the whole sentence using other words. Sometimes ending up with totally nonsense sentences. I know it's a bad habit but still do it sometimes and I have to try really hard to stop myself from doing it.

So perhaps I am using this as an excuse for not posting for a few months, perhaps I just really needed to get this of my chest, hoping that I wont hesitate about writing. I guess I just need to keep calm and write on!